Saturday, October 22, 2011

What we do to be parents......Home Visit renewal....

We came home about 730pm exhausted after a full day and an hour drive after spending a wonderful day with my cousin and his wife.  We have our homestudy renewal visit tomorrow after 13 months of waiting for our children.    Its at 10 am and we went crazy cleaning the house at 8pm.  Well, as I was cleaning the kitchen, my husband was dusting and vacuuming the rest of the house.....and as I was scrubbing the bathroom and the toilet I thought to myself...."I will do anything it takes to be a parent"....... and  then I thought.......Do others work so hard to prove themselves to be worthy of a child??  Why do we have to go through home visits, medical exams, fingerprints, background checks, financial statements, federal immigration approval, W2's and personal references letters to be worthy to be parents of a child when others can bear children no questions asked??  Must we be so perfect???   Are all parents perfect?? We have so much love to give and there are millions of children that need love so .......I just get frustrated......
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11 comments:

  1. Laura and BrianOctober 23, 2011 at 2:38 PM

    Hang in there. I agree, if they made all people jump through the same hoops they do for those adopting, well, there might not be many children to adopt! I'm sure your time is coming and God is just choosing the absolute best child you will love that needs you in return. Still, it is frustrating- feel free to vent to the rest of us adoptive mommies because totally understand and will offer loads of support :)

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  2. momtobeOctober 23, 2011 at 6:31 PM

    Hey Laura, can you please give me your blog info as I think you went private and can not view your blog...or just include me..differentpathhome.blogspot.com
    Thanks so much for your support and I pray for your your family to be complete as well:)

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  3. Laura and BrianOctober 23, 2011 at 6:34 PM

    I actually need your email to "invite" you- send it to my personal email bnlred@bellsouth.net and I'll add you. Blogspot can be a pain....

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  4. Laura and BrianOctober 23, 2011 at 6:36 PM

    Btw, if you are on Facebook, alot of us adoptive mommies are all "friends". Great way to get updates, photos, etc regarding the adoptions and agencies etc. Let me know :)

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  5. Jennifer A.October 23, 2011 at 11:08 PM

    Well said! I hope the visit went well. We are soon behind you with the updating of the homestudy. :-(

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  6. Laura and BrianOctober 24, 2011 at 10:18 AM

    Girls, check and see if you need to update your homestudy. I talked to Heidi last night (another mom adopting from Poland) and looked at the USCIS site and 1) you can extend the I800-A once for free and 2) it said you didn't need to update the home study unless there was a major life change (residence, criminal history, financial status, marital status, another person living with you or another child etc). Granted, it might vary state to state, but this is the federal site and they are who approve the I800 etc. We all need to double check this with both USCIS and our agencies because from how it looks, only the I800-A has to be extended before it expires. Just a thought and something to be aware of :)

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  7. momtobeOctober 24, 2011 at 9:31 PM

    Thanks Laura for that update! My state, NJ, needs yearly but need to do it timely for free...after that you need to pay extra....prayers for all of us families waiting for children who need love..Lord bless us.

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  8. RamieOctober 25, 2011 at 9:14 PM

    You said it very well....I still feel the same even after our girls have been home one year. We have our final home study in a couple of weeks. I was telling a co-worker that we get to complete one last home study to make sure we are being good parents....and pay hundreds of dollars for it. In the meantime I call my students parents about their kids grades and behavior in my class and they either tell me "I don't know what to do with them" or they don't call back. Why have they not been required to have a home study to see if they would be good parents. I am sure we all feel the same as you do.

    In the meantime your kids are out there waiting and I hope and pray you will hear something soon!

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  9. momtobeOctober 25, 2011 at 9:40 PM

    Thank you everyone, the support from the Polish adoption community has been such a comfort to me. God bless you all as well as your families. I hope one day I can be of support to a waiting family.

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  10. MarkNovember 6, 2011 at 1:50 PM

    Hi momtobe,

    A future dadtobe here...just thought I'd sa hello. My wife and I are in the process of adopting a 1-4 year old boy from Poland and are on month 10 (Poland got our paperwork last Feb). Have you or any of the other folks here heard anything related to international adoption in Poland? Our adoption agent has told us that things seem to be moving slow this year...I was just wondering if anybody knew why that would be the case?

    Thanks!
    Mark

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  11. momtobeNovember 6, 2011 at 8:09 PM

    Hey Mark, None of us really know whats going on over there unfortunately...Its all a mystery. What agency are you using? Be well.

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