What we do to be parents......Home Visit renewal....

We came home about 730pm exhausted after a full day and an hour drive after spending a wonderful day with my cousin and his wife.  We have our homestudy renewal visit tomorrow after 13 months of waiting for our children.    Its at 10 am and we went crazy cleaning the house at 8pm.  Well, as I was cleaning the kitchen, my husband was dusting and vacuuming the rest of the house.....and as I was scrubbing the bathroom and the toilet I thought to myself...."I will do anything it takes to be a parent"....... and  then I thought.......Do others work so hard to prove themselves to be worthy of a child??  Why do we have to go through home visits, medical exams, fingerprints, background checks, financial statements, federal immigration approval, W2's and personal references letters to be worthy to be parents of a child when others can bear children no questions asked??  Must we be so perfect???   Are all parents perfect?? We have so much love to give and there are millions of children that need love so .......I just get frustrated......

Calm

For some reason...I feel a calm.  As anxious as I am for the call, I am cherishing my life  with my husband right now.  Don't get me wrong, I get teary eyed in my car sometimes leaving work with all of my friends talking about their children, giving birth, and getting pregnant.  In my heart of hearts, I know my call for my children will happen on God's time.  I pray every day and know that our blessing will come.  I just hope that they are being hugged and kissed, away from harm, and waiting for us as we are for them.  I hope they know that we are coming with open arms, and when we meet, it will be perfect.

We Belong Together

My husband and I went to an adoption conference this weekend called "Lets talk Adoption"  which was really wonderful.  I got to meet Dr. Jane Aronsen who is an internation adoption guru that I have researched much on the internet.  She was an amazing speaker and I got to speak to her about something that was on my mind....for me...it was like speaking to a celebrity!!  At this conference I bought two childrens books which simply brought tears to my eyes.  One is called "We Belong Together" and the other is " A Blessing from Above".  My husband had to remind me to "keep it together" as I read them at the exhibit with happy tears in my eyes.  What can I say?  As we renew our homestudy and CIS info,  I can't believe how that last year has gone by.  I just pray that every day brings us closer to our children who are also waiting for us.

In the mean time, I have started graduate school and am working on my second published article, life is busy.  But in my heart, my little ones are at the forefront, and wait patiently for them.